Wretched

Jonathan Valania

*This poem contains references to emotional, physical, and psychological abuse, as well as religious trauma and mental illness. Reader discretion is advised. It may be triggering for survivors of domestic violence. Please prioritize your well-being while engaging with this piece.

 

You screamed self-defense—

then struck again.


“You’re a terrible father.”

“I’ll abort him. You don’t deserve us.”


Your love wore a mask:

well-polished,

church-approved.

But behind closed doors—

fists,

threats,

other men.


Not sick.

Just cruel

in a godly disguise.


You never spoke of commandments.

Keeping one

would’ve meant

telling the truth.

 

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The System Wasn't Built For Me

 

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Letters I'll Never Send

It started with evidence—court documents, voicemails, and text messages meant to prove what was done behind closed doors. But somewhere in the quiet aftermath, it became something else. A record. A release. A slow, sacred beginning.

Letters I’ll Never Send is a poetry and prose collection drawn from the wreckage of an abusive relationship. These pages hold what was never safe to say out loud—fury, sorrow, confusion, love twisted by fear. It’s not a story wrapped in resolution. It’s what healing sounds like when you’re still in the middle.

The print edition includes exclusive poems and reflections not found online. A portion of proceeds goes toward supporting survivors of domestic abuse.

This book isn’t just for the ones who escaped.

It’s for anyone learning how to live after.